Thoughts On Site After Two Weeks...

So i've been at my site now for two weeks! Its been very interesting so far. So today I went to a funeral with some coworkers. We left at 6 am. I have to cover my head (no hair showing), my arms and wear a skirt down to my ankles. I ate some sort of intestines after the funeral (not sure which animal) it wasnt bad. The funeral was pretty typical but here the whole village is invited and shows up. And everyone eats a lot after! I thought americans ate a lot. We've got nothing on south africans. They pile their plates! This little vakokwani (grandmother in Xitsonga) at my work eats sooo much everyday! She makes me laugh! Also my face is heavily breaking out bc they use soo much oil. I also eat with my hands so the oil stays on them too. The other night cooked for myself in my little house alone and didnt use a fork or knife...i used my hands and no one was even their to watch me. I felt so integrated! People in my village love to watch malungu (white person) eat with their hands.

The past two weeks i've been going to huts in my village with my coordinate. People in the village love to feed me! They all buy my cold drink(which is pop here...very popular but u buy these huge glass bottles and then return the bottle and get money back). Esp bc I cant just drink any water I need to boil and filter it. They also like to give me food and have me try their food. Sometimes off their plates. I know one day I will prob get severely sick from this but I dont want to be rude and these people have so little but think nothing of it to make sure I am feed and given cold drink to welcome me. One lady gave me peanuts! Which I have never seen in a garden just always bought them in a store. In the beginning of training as I was missing this I thought hum...cashews...and realized I sadly (cant believe i'm admitting this ) didnt know where they came from. Now I know!!! They grow in the dirt and little plants grow on top and u pick them out. Then the people here boil them and salt them. SOOO good. And slightly warm! This made me think of my dad. He is nuts! I mean he loves nuts! (love ya dad) But it was exciting to learn something new and my host mom said we can plant them so I can pick my own nuts! Ndzi rhandza timanga! I love peanuts!

Which brings me to my host family. The Ndlovus. Such a great family. I prob live with the richest family in my village. My mom and dad are teachers outside of my village at a private school. My two little brothers Ntsako and Ntivo 13,8 yrs old are so cute and well behaved! They also go to the private school. My host mom said they get a better education their. My host mom I love! I really lucked out! Not only does she help me but shes a friend! Shes 38 years old and 8 months pregnant!!!! She knows English pretty well. At first it was hard...but shes understanding english much better now that I am around. (english is taught in schools here all over south africa...however in my village most people dont know it enough to talk or understand me...also adults didnt get english bc of apartheid and the disparity for blacks in school) My host mom (mhani-mother in xitsonga) is great! She wants to learn to cook american! I made her and my brothers grilled cheese! She was funny and said shed get fat if she ate this all the time. I told her in the US pregnant women could eat whatever they wanted. This was especially funny to me as I thought of all those steak n shake runs I made for my prego sister before I left! Ummm steak n shake. Back to my host mom. Shes very understanding of my cultural differences and that everything is new here! It was hard to explain that I use a washer and dryer to wash clothes in the US and the poor people in the US do too. When everyone here washed clothes by hand. But shes great! She encourages me to use my language and is really good with helping me learn! And she asks if I studied and if I spoke xitsonga more each day. She stays on top of me which is good! Also my host mom and real mom got to talk on the phone today!!!! I also got to talk to my brother mikey! He asked if I was glad I came...though his tone sounded more hopeful I wouldnt be and would want to come home!

The language is going well. Last week at the end of the week I felt great! I was hearing and speaking xitsonga well I thought. I felt really good and a friend back in the US even spoke a little xitsonga back to me via facebook chat which was super encouraging and motivating! However this week I feel I didnt advance much. I can have simple convos with people but a nurse at the clinic asked me to explain why pregnant women should get the h1n1 vaccine and I felt helpless and lost/not to mention stupid. (esp being a nurse in the US this is something that should be easy in comfortable for me in a job setting) Also the first week in my village everyone spoke slowly to me remembering I was learning. This week everyone spoke much faster!!! So it was hard to hear them. Hearing it is the hardest part. Who would have thought I have trouble listening??? SHOCKING! But i've started having people read my flashcards to me and me saying the word back. That helps so hopefully this new study technique will help me! Everyone at work is very helpful with helping me learn the language. They all love seeing my flashcards and helping me practice. One women especially, Dorris is great! Shes helped me a lot in developing my language skills. She doesnt speak any english but can identify words. She really takes her time with me and pulls me aside so we can work! Its weird but the people that speak no english actually help me learn better sometimes then the people who do speak some. I think its because its comfortable for me to ask questions in english and resort to it when I dont know what to say. When I speak with a nonenglish knowing person I have to rely on my Xitsonga only. I expect each week will be differerent and I will have many highs and lows with my language. But I need to learn it! At my work I wont be able to do anything with out it.

I love my vakokwani (grandma)! Shes is great! A cute little lady and I adore her. She knows/speaks no english (on that note even kids and people who do know english usually will not speak it to me-not sure why). One day a bull tried to charge me (luckily someone yelled malungu (white person) so I knew to move). My vakokwani is funny! She said not even the bulls are used to a white person! She thought it was hilarious! Also I am going to try again to post pics but having trouble. I put some on my facebook page so feel free to look!

While I live with probly the richest family in my village. My village is very poor. I live on my host families property ina little who bedroom hut. I have a small fridge and toaster oven/hot plate combo, bed, chair, wardrobe and desk. My family has a facet or pipe that supplies municipality water to our yard (we r very lucky). So this means one pipe feeds all the water on the property. Most people in my village dont have access to this. Some use burr holes. Some go fetch water from people pipes. I actually have a toilet and a bathtub!!! but no warm water and its not like in the US. I uses as little water as possible as water does run out at times. I wet my body. Turn the water off. Clean (ps just cant get clean enough here. I scrub scrub scrub. People here actually use large stones to clean their feet! Its like their own little spa from all the dirt. And I cant get my ears clean enough). Then rinse. Maybe a inch of water in the tube. However this is in my host families house. So if they rnt home or the house is locked at night I bucket bathe in my house and use a bucket as my bathroom. Which by now is totally normal to me. Its weird how at first some things were so different and strange and now I dont think twice about them. Like eating with my hands, washing my hands in these basins of water with just water-thats how its done here. So thats my living situation...HOWEVER that is not typical of my village! I've been doing door to doors to learn about the people in my village and it is sooo sad. Toilets are one of two things... a pit latreen/outhouse (which usually is a little 2x2ft with a hole some u sit down on and some u stand on a squat down) or a field. Yep a lot of people in my village just dont have toilets. They just go outside. Most people here cook with fire outside or fire inside a roundavel designated for cooking. Most people eat pap (pronounced pop). Its maise meal or corn substance its white and sticky and u eat it with ur hands and u soak it up with like meat/veggies/broth. Most people eat pap, bread (a loaf at a sitting per person) and corn. Maybe veggies/fruit/meat on holidays or if they grew them in the garden. Diets here are horrible. I am trying to eat healthy to lead by example and the clinic/hbc (home based care) I work/volunteer at wants me to do a nutrition campaign. Having a cold drink and loaf of bread is what most women at my work eat for lunch. Lots of salt, oil, and butter in any veggies/meat. My host mom cooks very healthy though and very well! I love her pap! (its really sad but I now start to crave it when I havent had it in a while...its weird and disturbing to me)

I know this experience is about to get harder before it get easier. But I feel many ups and downs. I can be frustrated not speaking well and sick of people shoving food in my mouth and watching my every move and then someone so poor can make sure to give me nuts and a cold drink and welcome me and I feel regenerated and inspired! Also the kids here have no toys. The stores...dont sell toys. I am thinking now instead of getting carepackages for me or changing my tune to help the kids and maybe ask for like blow up beach balls, flimsy bases (I wanna teach kickball), balloons, the tennis ball thing u throw and the two circle things w/ velcrow...ya know small little things but when kids here use plastic bags from bread balled up into a soccer ball I figure if people r willing to send packages maybe I can make them more meaningful then cookies, books and tampons (although i'm sure i'll want that stuff too on bad days) but this is just a though I had. I bought a group of kids chips and cold drink today after helping me carry all my heavy stuff off the taxi to my house and they were more excited about it then any nice gift i've ever given to a child in the US.

Speaking of children. I MISS my sister and her little baby laya! But I am sooo excited that my host mom is having a baby. I feel its like god knew what I would miss in the US and gave it to me here to help. Also my brothers are about the age of my two little cousins jordan and nick which are sooo hard to be away from. But letters are great! Emails are great! I got a phone call from a friend lauren the other day that made my day! It woke me up at like 1am SA time but I didnt care! It was wonderful!!! Its nice being reconnected to the world and having internet but also it takes time away from studying and learning and there just isnt enough hours in the day here...esp since everything takes longer like washing clothes by hand etc etc. Its also kinda sad/happy to see what i'm missing out on. But I have to say I love my sister! She has soo many great questions and I know she just wants to know every detail! So when I finally figure out how to load pics i'lll have to apply captions as well!

Animal siting this week: woke up with a frog in my bed, a bat tried to fly at my head one night, oh and I saw my first cat! I also am loving that I have a little routine down with my parents! I had my phone on me all day today even in the bathroom bathing just incase they called (they usually do on the weekends) I was soo excited when they did! I tell my parents everything back in the states so there is a lot of stuff sometimes I just wanna pick up the phone and tell them. For example I was on a antimalaria med that gave me crazy dreams and some anxiety- I knew calling my dad would make me feel better bc he just understands bc he knows me so well and he did I felt fine after and switched off the medication onto another one that is working just fine. He asked all about my dreams and asked if I could control the crazy dreams etc. I knew hed make me feel better. Also, I like that my parents expect me to have up/downs and will just tell me that normal and to keep working at it-like with my language. My dad just gives the best advice. He says “there'll be times when u hate it and want to come home but just work through it”. It helps too that he lived in japan for 4 years so he knows what hes talking about! I am lucky to have such a great support system. Also, its not like I can vent and complain here like I would in the US. Since A. I cant talk in the language well enough to do that, B. it would be culturally insensitive C. I dont really have “friends” here like I would in the US but I do have other PCVs that I can connect with and talk with. Great group of people! I really like the people that are close to me! Things are just different here. Not bad but just different. Like when I go shopping. The ladies from work go with me bc they dont want me to be alone. They want to see everything I buy. Then when I get home the kids and my host mom want to see what I buy. People want to know what I eat. They wanna watch me eat. They wanna watch me clean. See my house. Watch me speak. I'm kinda famous in my village! Everyone knows my name-nyiko or malungu (white person) I respond to both. Being called white doenst really bother me. Once in a while it might but after 3 months of it...pretty use to it. Plus little kids r super cute! They love to say how r u! They dont know the response but they know its English and i'm white so i'll know it. They get soooo excited to see me! Its really kinda cool. But people just want to know me see what i'm reading, what i'm writing, what i'm studying, how I cook etc etc. a lot of cultural exchange going on. And I am really enjoying it too! Although...it would be nice to just go shopping not having everyone watching what ur buying. It was funny shampoo here is hard to find since i'm the only white person and everyone else uses oil. My boss just couldnt understand why I wouldnt buy the oil and put it in my hair! Haha. No one in my village really drinks either. It is a Christian village. And I am thankful no one really drinks (so far that i've seen...where I was staying before there were drunk people everywhere and its not like the US where drunks r in bars. Nope here they start at 6 am and are walking in the village talking to u, asking for money and marriage...so glad its not like that in my village) But I did buy some wine and got a recipe from another PCV on how to make homemade wine which i'm super excited about! I'm thinking apricot! (the fruits here are 100 times better than in the US) Also i've already devised a plan to boil water and sneak a water bottle of wine into the bathroom one night so I can have a little bubble bath and wine! I loved doing this at home and cant wait to do it here! I'm hoping maybe my aunt Maryjo will spare some of her vanilla bubble bath and send me some! I figure i'm already weird and white...glass of wine and a bubble bath is just one more thing my host family will think I am weird for doing. Oh well! I'm all about integrating but there are some things i'd like to keep from my culture! I am excited to start cooking too! I've already made no bake oat and peanut butter cookies! Very yummy! And cannot wait to try baking some bread! I bought some olive oil and basil and hoping to dip the bread in it! My wonderful friend ms. Erin socha (raig) sent me some recipes I can try here with my limited resources! What a great friend! And she always makes great bread! Welp I think thats all for today! Tomorrow I am going to church with a coworker! Keeping busy doing activities with coworkers and family! Really have very little down time. I love and miss everyone but having a great time and learning a lot about culture, poverty, aids, and myself. Here are just a few things to leave u with....

Interesting Things (Not good or bad just different)

-People here eat with their hands.

-Picking your nose in public totally normal. While in a convo w/ someone not rude or grouse

-“Polish” to clean floors here is made of cow manurer (yep poop) its their shangan (culture) polish

-People eat all of the apple (core too)

-People eat all of the animal. Head feet organs etc

-Oranges are called oranges here but they are yellow (taste the same)

-Cant show thighs but boobs are out all the time (ex: breast feeding is a public activity)

-People ask if I am related to Eddy Murphy

-People here tell me I will be black when I go home after two years of living here (and truly believe this)

-Toilet paper isnt in most public or home bathrooms in my village and in town u have to pay to use a bathroom (the things I took for granted in the us) (however my host family keeps tp in their bathroom, its easy to buy and when I use someone elses outhouse they always offer to give me some...so I think people just use it for number 2 here and drip dry for number 1)

-milk here sits out on shelves and only needs to be refrigerated once opened

Oh and on a more serious note: the effects of apartheid. Its really sad to see blatant racism. And when I go into town or see whites/blacks/coloured (people who arent white or black ex: indians) interact it is apparent. Its really sad and heart breaking to have a white or indian person talk down to one of my coworkers and then ask me how I can work with these people. They will talk to them like they are stupid then talk to me in a totally different tone/attitude. They are rude and cute them off too. Not to say this is everyone. South africa has made sooo many amazing strides in overcoming apartheid in such a short amount of time...but it is still sad and shocking when I see this in person. It is just not something I am used to in the U.S.. Also I visited a mentally ill person in my village. Its sad due to lack of resources she is locked in a room with just a mattress and a bowl of pap so shes cant hurt herself and put in depends. Her family takes good care of her but just so different from what someone whod is mentally ill in the US would get treated. She just scoots around the floor...shes also blind. Breaks my heart.

On a happy note: every sun rise and sun set here is breath taking. The sky at night its beautiful. The stars the moon. Just amazing. Africa is a beautiful country and i cant believe i get to call it home for the next two years! also i've started running in the morning! which is exciting to me!